FREE FASHION ADVICE!

Stop wearing "I'M A MAC" t-shirts.

You look like a retard.



Stop wearing "I'M A PC" t-shirts.

You look like a retard.

New life goal!

• Learn to play the song "Buddy Holly" on accordion.
  

I got it

My Chemical Romance is music for people who think they're depressed.

IT'S 8 O CLOCK

WHY IS IT NOT DARK OUT?

I WANT TO SLEEP

STILL HAVE WORK TO DO

BUT WANT TO SLEEP

AND PLUS I FEEL CRAPPY RIGHT NOW

TOOK THREE OR FOUR SHITS TODAY

THAT'S NOT GOOD

ACCIDENTALLY SUFFOCATED A BUTTERFLY

THAT'S NOT GOOD EITHER

BUT IT'S TOO LIGHT OUT FOR SLEEPING

AND I FEEL LIKE SHIT

Is the Donkey Kong of the 90's the son or the grandson of the Donkey Kong of the 80's????

WELL HUH WHAT DO YOU THINK

WHO CARES?

TRIP

I'm setting up Windows 95 on this old computer I got for free. I had to install the sound card driver to get sound. When I did, I got sound. It was good.

And then, I was doing something, and I got an error message. Does anyone remember the Windows 95 error sound? It's basically a harsh-sounding piano chord.

I got an error onscreen, and I heard that piano chord error sound, for the first time in over a decade.

And for a few seconds this morning, it truly was 1996 all over again, with the Packard Bell PC, the DOS shareware games, the mouse with the ripply buttons, and America On-Line 3.0 installed off a floppy disk.

Please purchase this brand of instant noodles immediately.

The reason being is that these are the most awesomest instant noodles I've ever tried. The current packet has been corrected to say "Spicy Seafood" and they're NOT FUCKING KIDDING. When you cook them, you get gobs of seaweed floating around the bowl, and the broth looks like some sort of Taco-Bell-from-hell extra spicy sauce diluted with demon tears. And that's what it tastes like, too.

The first spoonful of noodles brought a fit of coughing from being PUNCHED IN THE FACE by the sheer combined force of the spicy noodles and hot temperature. Now they've settled down, but I still have a bottle of Coke perching on my half-broken external Maxtor to provide relief between bites.

Ditch the Maruchan, and buy some NOW.